Advice you have sent in

Something I have learnt and come to accept is just how difficult it can be to express my thoughts, emotions and experiences to others. Let alone talking to my parents and other family members whose own emotions I feel I have to hold in mind too when having these, at times, turbulent discussions. That can be a huge minefield to tackle and even after 13 years of struggling with my mental health it remains something that I grapple with most days. However, that doesn’t mean we should shy away from such discussions. A problem shared is a problem halved, right?

Something I turn to again and again is the power of writing. When I need to express how I am feeling or when I feel the need to share something that is painful to discuss verbally I will write it in a note or a letter to my parents. Through writing it down not only does it provide you with the time and the space to get your thoughts down on paper (which in itself can be an incredibly insightful process) but also the opportunity to take as much time over it as you need. No one is aware that you’re writing a letter so there isn’t any secondary pressure from parents or other family members to ‘hurry up’. I will very often leave the note on the side in the kitchen and when I’ve seen that it’s gone I know my parents have read it. In your note or letter you can also request how you’d like a response. Now that you’ve broached the topic of discussion does it feel okay to have the conversation in person or would you prefer a written note back? It’s about finding what works for you. - Em